On today’s episode of the podcast, Kristen is interviewing anti-racism coach Alyssa Hall. Alyssa works with coaches and other service providers to help them become anti-racist in their life while interweaving diversity, equity, and inclusion practices into their business. To learn more about Alyssa, click here or find her on Instagram here.
Join them as they discuss:
- Alyssa’s inspirational journey from making $1.5k in 5 months to multiple $10k+ months.
- The money beliefs she held as a Black woman and single mother – both with and without money!
- Finding (and shifting!) your niche.
- Operating your business from a place of contribution and passion.
- The importance of diversity and inclusion and the impact each one of us can make as anti-racist allies.
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Transcripts for Money 2.0- Thoughts from a Black Coach + Single Mom Episode #13:
Kristen Boss (00:05): Welcome to Purposeful Social Selling with Kristen Boss. I’m your host, Kristen Boss. I’m a mindset and business coach with more than 15 years experience in both the product and service based industry. I believe that social selling is the best business model for people wanting to make an impact while they make serious income. This is the podcast for the social seller, who is tired of feeling inauthentic in their business and desires to find a more purposeful and profitable way of growing their business in today’s social media landscape. In this podcast, you will learn what it takes to grow a sustainable business through impactful and social marketing. It’s time to ditch the hustle and lead from the heart. Let me show you the new way.
Kristen Boss (00:48): Hello everyone. And welcome back to another week. I am really excited about today’s episode. I’m genuinely tickled pink. And let me tell you why. So this episode, if you’ve seen the title was money 2.0 and I mentioned when I did the money beliefs episode, I mentioned how I felt at the end that there was more to this conversation. I was painfully aware at the end of this conversation that I was having about money beliefs, that my context was very limited. And I was very aware that I grew up in the upper middle class. I’m a white woman and I’ve had a lot of opportunities afforded to me in my life. And I just felt that if the money episode stayed the way it was, I felt that it wasn’t a full story. And so today I’m really, it’s my honor to bring on a friend and fellow coach. Her name is Alyssa. Alyssa, welcome. I’m so glad you’re here.
Alyssa Hall (01:48): I’m so excited to be here. Thank you for having me.
Kristen Boss (01:51): Yes, I am, I’m so excited to have this conversation with you because I believe this is so important and I feel like people need to hear diverse stories on many different facets of life. And there’s been a lot this year about the conversation and as you and I both know, there’s a lot more to be had still. And I feel like this is one element that I think is a really unique area to lend a voice, especially for black women, which is why I wanted you on the show today. And I’m just so happy to have you here. So, listeners, I hope you’re ready because Alyssa has just such a powerful story. I heard about Alyssa while I was away at my mastermind weekend with Samantha and she was, she is a student of Samantha’s and when Samantha was telling me her story, I was blown away and I just had so much respect, and Alyssa and I connected. And I asked if she’d be willing to add to this conversation. And she was more than happy to do it. So I am just so excited to get started on this stuff, Alyssa, I know a little bit about your story, but my audience does not. So I want to go back a little bit. I want to rewind, I want you to tell my audience a little bit about where you were a year ago.
Alyssa Hall (03:19): Okay. It’s so funny because a year ago, Lord Jesus, I was just in such a different space and it’s crazy because literally exactly a year ago is when I made a huge shift. I was living in a beautiful apartment with my daughter, with my ex-boyfriend her dad. And with my cousin and her boyfriend, it was the most beautiful apartment we’ve ever like had as adults. And the lease was up and my boyfriend and I were no longer together. So then we were just like, okay, he’s not going to be there. And he was the moneymaker. He was the reason why we were even able to get the apartment. And then my cousin and her boyfriend were like, listen, this is too much like in terms of like financially, we’re just gonna go back to our parents’ house and just, we’re all just gonna do that.
Alyssa Hall (04:09): We’re all just going to split up and go back to like our family’s house. But for me, I had a child and I don’t really have, I have parents, but not close enough for me to be like, I’m going to live with you guys for however long. My mom lives in a one bedroom apartment. My dad lives like an hour away. And I live in New York City. He lives in Long Island. That’s like, that’s not even the same thing. So I was just like, all right. So the only family member that I had is my uncle who lives in my grandparents old apartment. And it’s a three bedroom apartment. He’s the only one here. So I was like, you know what, I’m just going to live with him, whatever, that’s my plan. I’m sticking to the plan. It’s going to be great. I’m going to build my business at this time. I hadn’t been working for like four or five months because I quit my job to do my coaching business. And in total, out of those like five months, I made $1,500. And that was it.
Alyssa Hall (05:11): You couldn’t imagine what the stress was like. So right now, as we’re recording this, it’s the beginning of September. And the lease was ending over there at August 31st or August 30th, whatever the last day, because it was. And so I was just like, I could barely even pay for the U haul to drive across town. I could barely pay for literally anything I had to ask my daughter’s father. And he at the time was terrible with money, so he could barely pay for it. And my credit cards were all maxed out from like, not working for four months. It was legitimately insane. And so a year ago I, we had just moved in here and I hated it. I legitimately hated everything. And I was just, you know what, it’s fine. I’m just going to, I believe in myself, I’m going to just pursue my business and just keep doing that.
Alyssa Hall (06:05): I’m going to go back to my job at a restaurant that I had a couple of years ago. They’re going to take me back because that’s just like, I call that job almost like the the, the rebound boyfriend. Like whenever I’m stuck, just go back to that job. And that’s what I did. I was like, all right, I’m just going to go back and work there. I’m going to build my business. It’s going to be great and gonna put my daughter in daycare. It’s going to be great. And it was not, it was not great at all. I don’t know. I think since your audience is network marketers, they may know what it’s like to like, try to have like the side business.
Kristen Boss (06:41): Yeah. Hustlers. They don’t, they know that they know that game real well.
Alyssa Hall (06:47): You tell yourself, oh, it’s going to be cool. I’m going to work on the weekend. I’m going to work when I get home. And you’re actually at your job longer than you think. And you’re actually taking on more at your job with your kids more than you think. And so in my brain where my money mindset was, was just survival. It was literally like survival. I was at a point where I was what I was making was not enough to hit my bills and because my daughter’s father was paying for most of daycare, it’s not like I was getting like a child support check or anything. So it was just like, it was crazy. It was so, so crazy. And not to think like a year later, I, I think, I, I don’t think I would’ve believed anything would have happened, like the way that it is now a year ago. So like, I feel like that this is super like detailed picture that I painted, but that’s where I was a year ago.
Kristen Boss (07:44): Yeah. What were your thoughts about money and success for you at that time, especially when it came to being a successful coach and building that business. What were your beliefs at that time?
Alyssa Hall (08:00): My beliefs were I need to work extremely hard and I’m not working hard enough. And that’s the only reason why I don’t have money it’s because I haven’t worked hard enough. And there was some truth to that. You know, like I could look at the four months or five months that I wasn’t working. And there were a lot of times where I didn’t do as much as I wanted, but having that that primary thought of I’m not working hard enough. So that’s why I’m not making any money. It actually doesn’t help you get to the real reason why you’re not making money. So it’s just like, yeah, you’re not working hard enough, quote, unquote, hard enough, but why what’s actually stopping you. It’s not the fact that you have to work harder. It’s like, there’s actually something underneath that. So that’s what my main thought was like, I need to just keep going. I need to keep doing. And for like months, I don’t even know. I didn’t know what selfcare was. I didn’t know what taking a break was or if I did, I would like overindulge and then feel terrible. It was, it was a whole mess.
Kristen Boss (09:03): Oh yeah. I talk about that cycle a lot with my audience, like the hustle, burnout, total exhaustion, and then you feel guilty after you burned out and then you go back out there and hustle and do the same thing all over and over again. So what finally, because you invested in a coach and you were, it sounds like you, your living expenses were much higher than what your income was. You were working really hard, but it still wasn’t closing the gap. So something made you willing to invest. Like what did you have to believe and what were your thoughts leading up to making an investment?
Alyssa Hall (09:46): Ooh. Oh my gosh. Yeah. And you actually like brought up another key point that I actually forgot in this time where all I made was $1,500. And like my credit cards were maxed out. I had invested in a coaching program and a private coach. And my thought process was this is going to be the thing to like, make me money, not really thinking of what I have to do. And like the thought work that I have to do. But more of like this investment will be, it will give me like the magic tool to make money.
Kristen Boss (10:21): That is so good. Where you almost looking at it like, yeah, I’m going to spend this money. And just this coach is going to get me there. Instead of the coach is going to provide me tools that I’m going to use and implement myself to create my results. So you were still very much looking at results outside of yourself.
Alyssa Hall (10:43): Yes, literally that, and then I would do, like, I remember in the program and like looking back on it now, it didn’t really align with like me as, as a person, but I was just like, I’m doing the worksheets, I’m doing the thing I’m showing up to coaching. I don’t understand. I’m still poor. What is happening? And yeah, that’s how that went.
Kristen Boss (11:05): Really? That what you just said is so key, you literally said I’m doing the things I’m showing up and I’m still poor. Like, I really believe that a lot of my listeners are in this place. They’re like, I’m doing the things I’m working my butt off. I’m doing what people tell me I paid for this online course. Why am I not getting results? So what did you finally have to realize in order for you to actually get results and get out of being truly broke?
Alyssa Hall (11:36): Yes. Oh my gosh, what I learned. And so like right now, we’re talking about a year ago. What I learned is actually something I learned like four to five months ago and it was about not having this checklist. There is no magic checklist and I to really get that out of my brain, what it’s more about is really looking into myself. So by the time that I finally after that, like one client where I made the $1,500 when I finally got another client, it was May or April of this year. And, and she, I paid, no, she paid me $27 a session for four sessions. And after the third session, she goes to me and through that process with her and like getting consults to not really signing a new client every single time, that would end, I’d be like, what do I do? I’m wondering, is there something that I need to change?
Alyssa Hall (12:37): Is there something that was unclear and really evaluating myself? And that is where I realized, oh yeah, I can post every single day and, you know, make offers every single day and do all these checklist items and add people on Instagram and do all the things. But if at the end of the day, it’s not reaching anyone. If the process to even talk to me is complicated. If all of these things are not in, or like not in place in the way that’s simplified for my audience, then nothing’s going to happen. And I only was able to figure out that when I realized like, okay, I need to pay attention to where my head is when I’m having these conversations and like really evaluate myself at the end of every consult at the end of every, even a coaching call, like what could I have done better? And why did that happen? The way that it did?
Kristen Boss (13:35): I think that’s so huge. And just to draw a parallel for my network, marketers, I always say there are so many similarities between growing a coaching business and a network marketing business because it does require like you to meet people, you to make an offer about your product or your opportunity for you to get in the conversation. And it has to feel natural to both the coach or the seller and the buyer. And so a lot, my audience often get caught up in like, I’m making posts, I’m doing things. I’m inviting people to events and they’re banging their heads against the wall, wondering what’s wrong. But I, I love that you said, I decided to really evaluate my headspace and my thoughts around all the things I was doing. And this is really key. You were evaluating a lot. And I think most people get so discouraged that they want to just say, this doesn’t work at all.
Kristen Boss (14:28): And then they throw the strategy out. They give up instead of like, okay, well what went right here? And what can I do differently? So I, I love that you realized, okay, I could be doing the things, but maybe it’s my energy and my thoughts around all the things that are creating the results I want or don’t want in this. So I love that. So tell me about a key shift that happened for you that started to change everything about this. Almost like this broke identity of like, I have to struggle really hard and I have to work so hard. Tell me, do you, can you name a moment where you feel like there was a key shift or a key thought that you arrived at where you’re like, oh, maybe it doesn’t have to be this way?
Alyssa Hall (15:21): Yes. Oh my gosh. So that actually happened. When I switched my niche and I didn’t do it for the sake of just like, oh, this isn’t working anymore. It was more of just like, so before all this, I was a life coach for moms and I helped them like, you know, build businesses or do whatever it was like they wanted to do, but felt like they couldn’t. And then when I decided to switch my niche, it was right after the murder of George Floyd. And I was just like, you know what? I don’t care about this mom coach and stuff right now. I don’t really even have the brain space to talk about it. I’m just going to talk about what people can do to help. Because I see a lot of business owners that are just like running around in circles and everyone’s running around in circles, screaming, no one knows what to do and or how to help.
Alyssa Hall (16:12): And I was just like, you know what, let me just simplify this for everyone. Let me just talk about this. I was on Facebook live nearly every single day, posting multiple times a day about like resources and like my best practices going into Facebook groups and helping people out there and just like really from a place of, Hey, I know you guys are scared. I know you guys are stuck. I have a simple way to do this. And it wasn’t until like two weeks into just doing that where Samantha and my therapist on the same week, we’re both like, why don’t you just switch your niche? And then I did that. I was so scared. I was like, but I built everything out already. What do you mean switch it? You don’t understand. And when I switched it, I was in this place of, this is what I am passionate about.
Alyssa Hall (17:07): And everything that came out of me that flowed out of me was from passion. And when I got into a conversation with people, then it switched from passion to let me help this girl out because this girl, oh my gosh, she needs me. And like, let me really see what I can do to help her, or can I steer her in the direction of help or can I show her what’s actually missing from what she needs? And it, that alone has made everything flow. I’m never sitting around. Like, I know that, oh my gosh, before all this, every single month I would make like a list of like all my expenses and I’d be like, alright, so I need to create two clients by the 15th so that I can pay off this bill. And then by the 30th, I need to pay off another one. And then if it’s a payment plan, then it can do this. But if it’s a pay-in-full that I only need this, like, it was insane. And I don’t have those thoughts anymore. I’m just like, this is what I do. Yeah.
Kristen Boss (18:06): How do you feel that has shifted your energy from being in this panicked, I need to create this plan to pay my bills to this energy of like, I love that. You said I’m so passionate about it. I feel like I’m in flow. I feel like I’m doing it’s. What I’m hearing is you’re doing what you were made to do. You found a problem that needed solving in the world and you brought value from a place of not even need, like you were not coming to Facebook. And those groups have a place of like, I’m going to meet my own needs. You saw a greater need of like, this is what the world needs. This is what our society needs. This is what I see these coaches and entrepreneurs need. And you decided to follow that intuition instead of being like, but no, I’ve branded myself this way.
Kristen Boss (18:52): This is permanent. I can’t leave this. You follow this in intuition. And I tell my audiences a lot because they’re very much taught, like, just talk to anybody who will listen. And I’m like, no, it’s kind of different in network marketing where I almost sound like pick a target audience, but I tell them to talk about the things that make them come alive. The things that it’s not a struggle for them to come up with content. It’s not a struggle for them to go live because they’re like, this is meaningful to me. And I’m finding a way for this to be meaningful to others. And when that shift happens, content creation is easy, right? And then serving people is easy. We’re less, we feel less scarce around our month and how we’re going to survive. We’re no longer operating from our own survival, but we’re operating from contribution, which I think it sounds like that’s what you experienced that shift in you. So I want to tell, so tell my audience because I absolutely love what you do and it’s so necessary right now. Alyssa, tell my audience what your niche is and what happened after you shifted your niche.
Alyssa Hall (19:59): Yes. So my niche is I help coaches and other service providers become anti-racist in their life and in their business while interweaving diversity, equity, and inclusion practices into their business. And it’s just like, oh, I’m like so excited. Even just like saying that I just, there are so many different ways that just doing that work can help you as a person can help your clients can help the people around you. People that you will never meet. If you just have one conversation with one person, then that can, you’re creating another safe space for a black person or a person of color, like literally, like it is so amazing when your becomes a safe space, you’re helping more people come in and you’re helping more people get what they need. Like, oh, it’s just, it’s so beautiful. It’s so exciting.
Kristen Boss (20:56): And I love that. I love, I picture you standing in the gap where, when George Floyd was murdered, when that happened, a lot of influencers and people with platforms kind of paralyzed, they like seized dumb. Like they didn’t know what to do. Some did some things, some did other things, some were terrified about how to say. And so you’re stepping into this gap of someone that for me, for example, where I’m like, okay, what does this look like? I’m afraid of misstepping. I don’t want to do it wrong and your eye. And I see where I want to go with my own growth and my own learning and my own awareness and how I want to use my platform. And I see it felt like this huge gap. And I wondered like, am I going to stumble my way through there? And it’s like, you created this business from a deep place of service and compassion saying, I’m going to help you get there and it’s going to be a safe place and I’m going to help you.
Kristen Boss (21:54): I’m going to provide the tools and I’m a hold you accountable and kick your booty to make sure you’re actually following through. And you’re not just doing this to sound good. Right. So that we don’t walk around just saying like, I have a diversity coach, so it’s okay. Like, no, that’s not, that’s not it. So it just sounds like there was the right timing in this as well. Like it’s, it’s tragic like 2020 has just been a really hard year, but it sounds like you found this divine positioning for lack of a better terminology for you to say, I will step in this gap and I would love to hear, tell me what happened with your business when you decided to step into that gap. I have goosebumps. Like I just, I just kill so many things while we’re talking. Like, I wish you could see my arms.
Alyssa Hall (22:48): Wait until you hear, because again, y’all listen, we’re recording this September 5th and I didn’t even tell you about September. Cause when we spoke, it was, it was still August. So when we spoke so all this week, it was like, wait till I get on the podcast and tell her I’m so excited. Okay. So the entirety of last year, I made $1,500 in my coaching business cash. I’m only going to talk about cash. June, I made $8,000. July, I made $12,350 in August. He made $9,940. Today is September 5th, and I’m waiting on two payments that I just enrolled literally two days ago. That will total $10,500.
Kristen Boss (23:47): Alyssa!! My cheeks hurt. I’m like smiling so big for you, Alyssa. This is beautiful. I love this so much for you. I, I have, I have so many thoughts. I’m very emotional for you in this moment, just because I just, I think a lot of people who might be single moms or women of color who are thinking that’s not available for them, or maybe you just got lucky and I think more people need to hear your story because we need more women stepping up saying me too. I can too. This is, this is totally possible for me. Gosh, it’s so powerful. Let me, how has your view about money changed since this has happened? Cause this, I mean this $1,500 in 2019. So like I need to get a calculator for the last like three and a half months, not even half months to, to tally what you’ve made since you’ve stepped into your purpose, which is just so powerful. So what are your new thoughts about yourself and money and success?
Alyssa Hall (25:09): I fully believe, and I feel like I always quote unquote, like had this belief, but I really believe that I am able to achieve whatever it is that I need to achieve. And I remember like when I first spoke to Samantha when I like started her program. I was like, yeah, you know, like I have really big money goals because I’m a single mom. I live in Manhattan and this is where I want my daughter to be. And this is where I want her to go to school. There are amazing schools out there. I don’t want to go back to the Bronx. I don’t want to do things like that. I just, this is what I want and it’s weird, but like I really wish I could make a hundred thousand dollars and I’m like, I know you’re gonna think I’m crazy. And she was just like, okay.
Kristen Boss (26:00): I know. It is so typical Samantha. Okay, and? Like, and? Yes.
Alyssa Hall (26:08): And, so I always had these large goals for that purpose. Not for like, like really for, in my head. It’s always like, it always boils down to survival and I feel like that single mom piece of just like survival, I don’t know if that will ever go away, but it doesn’t permeate into my actions, which I feel like it did before. And so now it’s like, okay, we’re still on. I need to make X amount, but not for survival, but more for like, so I could live this amazing so I could move. So I can have this beautiful apartment by myself so I can do all these things and just like, look around and say like I did that, like when I moved here, I’m like sitting at my desk, I bought my desk and I was like building it by myself. And when I built it, I was like, I felt like it was this thing up there. Any other single moms listening. Like I feel like there’s just a sense of pride. Always being able to do something like by yourself and being able to have that thing that you can look and just like, yeah, that was me. And so I can have those moments and I don’t need a partner. I don’t need someone else to be able to do those things. I can just level up and continue to scale and continue to pay attention to what I want to do in order to make that happen.
Kristen Boss (27:32): I’m I’m speechless. I, I, again, like, I’m just feeling so many emotions, just hearing you talk. And especially when you’re saying how you want this for your daughter and how you realized that this single mom part of you, that survival mechanism that I have to survive. It was interesting that you said it, it permeated your actions a lot last year. And now that it’s not permeating, like yes, there might be that part of you. That’s always there remembering that. I talked about that in that last episode the money episode with Samantha night, where we talked about struggling over the price of organic milk, there are still parts of us where we remember that. But I think there’s something really powerful in knowing you now know like you can say, my brain knows how to make $10,000. Now it’s not this pretend number. It’s not imaginary.
Kristen Boss (28:29): You now know you can add value to the world and you can create $10,000 in a month even more so $10,000. And it is the fifth, the fifth of the month. Like even faster, excuse me, $10,000 in five days. Right? So like, there’s, I think you can have this deep sense of knowing. I am a strong, capable woman who can do that. And I think that’s really powerful. I would love to know what would you, what do you want to say in regards to money and success? Like two questions really is one. Why do you think it’s important that we do talk about money?
Alyssa Hall (29:16): Hm. Oh my gosh. It is so important to really talk about money because you know, there are a lot of times where you have this imaginary figure in your head of what your worth is. And it is most likely based off of nonsense, most likely based off of what, whatever random job you had told you that you were worth for that specific position, but at the end of the day, your worth is so much better. Bigger, actually. It’s so much bigger than what you’ve been taught to believe. And so when you talk about money, you’re able to see like, this action is actually worth way more than I would have thought. Like thinking about almost like using the organic milk example. Like let’s say like, we are a glass of milk, we’re a bottle of milk and we cost out I don’t drink milk. So it’s like 99 cents.
Alyssa Hall (30:10): And then we’re just thinking, okay, I’m worth 99 cents. And then some bottle of organic milk comes next to you and that thing cost $4. You’re like $4. How are you allowed to be worth $4? We’re only worth a dollar. Did you not know that in your organics? Like, what are you talking about? Like, this is me. I am worth this much because I fuel bodies. I help people do this. Then it there, you’re just like, I do that too. Why am I only worth a dollar? I don’t understand. When you talk about money, you realize that a lot of the things are such nonsense and that you can actually do so much more and ask for so much more. That, that was the key thing for me. Why like outside of being like doing my business was like, I was able to ask for so much more. I was able to ask for a higher salary and go after jobs that had a higher salary because I realized, wait a minute, people are hiring for things that I just naturally have. And I’m sitting here getting paid nonsense. And what I could be getting paid is so much more because I know what the value of what other people value, certain things. I’m just not valuing it myself.
Kristen Boss (31:24): That’s so powerful. And I love that you said this idea of the 99 cent milk. That’s like, I’m worth a dollar, I’m worth a dollar. And then the organic milk comes along at $4. And the 99 cent gets a little upset because he like, who do you think you are being $4? We’re the same thing. Like, it’s fine. And it’s it’s and it’s, I don’t know about you. But part of my story was I used to feel deeply offended by the $4 milk. Or that either felt like it had some, some sort of it cheated to get there. Like it did something wrong to get there. Like you don’t deserve to be $4 milk. I was offended about it. Right. And I think that’s, that’s just from our own scarceness and from our own money stories and wherever we’re triggered, that’s where our growth is. And that’s hard around money. Like we’ve had to do some healing work and I’m sure. Now let me ask you this. What are some new thoughts that have come up with a lot of money coming your way? Like you went from $1,500 in a whole year to you’re about to sign like $10,000 in a five-day period. So like what absurd thoughts? Because my brain offered really absurd thoughts when a lot of money came in. What absurd thoughts did your brain tell you?
Alyssa Hall (32:48): You’re asking me to set the perfect time. So my daughter’s father, my co-parent he’s my sounding board whenever like all these nonsense thoughts come in thanks to quarantine. But in July I was like, that’s it I’ve peaked. Crying, crying. And then beginning of August, oh my God girl. The first week of August, I had four consults. Every single one was a different flavor of no. And I was like, I told you, I peaked. This is ridiculous. Oh my God. And then the last, last week of August is where I made a bulk of the 9,000. And then he’s like, oh, so you peaked? So you peaked? And then like, literally two days ago, he’s like, so you peaked? I thought you peaked in July. What month is it again? Different versions of.. You see this, this is the peak, now.
Kristen Boss (33:48): This is it. This is all. This is all you get. Oh my goodness. It’s so true. It’s so true. I remember when a really successful coach to me, he said after a certain income, she’s like, I just, I just don’t think anyone else has ever going to sign with me and like my brain on the outside, I’m like, that is about what? What? It’s like, your brain just thinks this is too big. Good to be true. This is all you get and it’s going to be gone. And it triggers our inner goblin, like hide in a cave, hoard it, count it, act. It’s so funny because it triggers scarcity at a different level. It triggers scarcity with money in your bank account, which is very weird to sit with. And I think what’s really interesting is while my audience isn’t signing high ticket, high ticket deals with clients they have the same energy in, I love that.
Kristen Boss (34:48): You said like the bulk of your sales was towards the end of August. And that means that tells me is that you were managing and coaching your brain all the way through the end of the month, instead of believing mid-month, I’ve totally peaked. I guess that’s it for me. And stop showing up or stop showing up as powerfully instead of doing that, you just kept showing up very powerfully. You coach your brain and be like, no, I’m going to keep doing this because I tell my network marketing audience, like hold consistent your belief from the first of the month to the 31st of the month or the 30th of the month. You keep going. But I really believe one, if we believe and entertain, we’ve peaked. It, I mean, how does that feel in your body when you say I’ve peaked? You just feel sick. Do you feel dread? Yes. Nothing good comes to them saying, we’ve peaked. This is it. Like I, and I’m laughing because I’ve totally thought that a couple of times. Being like, that’s it let’s go hide in the cave. This is it!
Alyssa Hall (35:55): Let me bow out now. You know what? I’ve embarrassed myself enough. This is it.
Kristen Boss (35:58): Yes. Yes! It’s almost like playing a game of wheel of fortune. Like, you spend that wheel enough? It’s going to hit bankrupt or you’re going to lose it all. Like, this is not, this is not a game show. Like your brain knows how to create that money so it can do it again. And I just, I, I wanted to ask you all that was like super fresh in your mind. Like what absurd thoughts have your br- your brain had with money? Because I talked about that in an episode, like, you’re going to have thoughts without money and thoughts with money. It’s really important to address it, which brings me back to.. Alyssa, I’d love to hear. Cause I had you listen to the, to the episode. What do you feel? Cause at the end I just felt like, you know what? This is, this is my context. I know there are gaps here, which is another reason why I really wanted your voice on this is I’d love to know. What you would like to add to the conversation about money, beliefs that I may have missed that might serve my audience better.
Alyssa Hall (36:55): Yes. Oh my gosh. There were two points where I was just like, oh my God, I can’t wait to like have this conversation. The first one was of course the organic milk that was just like number one. But for me it ranked different because I am, I’ve always been about like organic food. I’ve been trying to go vegan since I was like 12, I’m still not vegan. But
Kristen Boss (37:20): I did that. It was the longest two weeks of my life.
Alyssa Hall (37:25): I was in college. I did vegan for like two weeks and I ate French fries every day for two weeks. But, so for me, I was just like, I’ve always told myself I have the budget for the organic food. I have been going to Whole Foods and Trader Joe’s before I even could really afford Whole Foods and Trader Joe’s. But the thing was, everyone around me was doing their regular thing. Everyone else was going to Key Food and like Pathmark when that was a thing. And they were just like, that’s like rich white people stuff. You’re going to the, you’re going to Whole Foods like, oh, that’s why are you doing that? You only make, I remember at the time I was like making like $300 a week and they were like, why are you going to, to Whole Foods? Like you can literally just go to whatever.
Alyssa Hall (38:13): And like my boyfriend at the time, he’d be like, why? I’m like, I’m not having the conversation about the Whole Foods. We’re going to Whole Foods. But like, we’re like, we’re taught to be like, this is not your thing. This is not your level. And then you have to unlearn that. I unlearned it with Whole Foods. Cause I was like, this is important to me, eating organic food is so important to that. I am not going to like fall into that trap of that’s not for me, but like being a black, single mom, we have so many other things that are, that’s not for me, something as like almost normal as going to therapy was a, that’s a white people thing. Right. And it’s just like, and you know, society makes it that way too. It society makes it hard for regular people to go to therapy.
Alyssa Hall (39:05): So when you think of therapy, you’re just like, oh, that’s like 200 something dollars a session, but you do have insurance, but like how many therapists are actually taking insurance? So it’s like society also doesn’t help in framing these things to be like, quote, unquote normal. Like even when I was doing my organic food thing, I had to take the train for an hour to get to the part of Manhattan that had the organic food and then take it back home to the Bronx. So it’s just like I had to unlearn all of those things. And so I feel like, yeah, we have way more things that we have to unlearn. And I can’t remember what the second one was. Oh my gosh. When you were talking about how we’re raised to believe, like from the church that like having a lot of money is like, is not good.
Alyssa Hall (39:53): It’s the same thing, except it’s just like, there’s a certain level to it because it’s just like, you look at someone and they’re quote unquote normal. And then once they have a lot of money, oh, they’re bougie now. Oh, they’re different now. And then when you level up you’re around new people, but you’re trying to remain the same. So it’s, so there’s so many different levels of complexities of having a lot of money and what that actually means. And like if I’m in the hood and this is where I’m from and if I then go out and like live somewhere else and take all of the wealth that I’ve built and taken it somewhere else with me, what does that say about me? There are so many different levels that we have to experience in terms of like making money and experiencing wealth and being okay with experiencing that wealth.
Kristen Boss (40:47): Yeah. It was there. I definitely feel like there were parts of me again. I felt like my spirituality would be at risk. I felt perception. People’s perception that I really started feeling perception of me would change and being like wanting to hide things and like, do I share this? Do I not share this? In fact, I actually just shared something on my Instagram stories that frankly made me want to just poop in my pants where I just, I was like, okay, do I want to share this car? I got from myself as a, hitting a huge milestone and doing really big, scary things. And every, there was about 80% of me that like didn’t want to, but not for the reasons of, I didn’t like my, the reasons were like, I’m afraid of what people will think of me instead of, I was like, well, why do I want to share it?
Alyssa Hall (41:40): And I realize someone needs to see like I know for me when I was doing big, scary things, I loved seeing other people’s risks pay off. Like I wanted to see people win. I wanted to see people have success and it was so inspiring for me. So I’m like, there are people who have been following me for three, four, or five years on Instagram. They remember seeing my struggle, how hard things were. So if I want, if we’re gonna share anything, if we’re gonna use our abundance a be charitable obviously, but also like how can you have wealth? You Alyssa and me, how can that be a powerful tool to inspire somebody else to say, I can have that too. If it’s available for her, it’s available for me. Right? And so getting over all that fear of like, I don’t care what the wrong people are going to hate me anyway, but there are some people that need to see this, to know that Hey, hard work pays off.
Kristen Boss (42:46): Working smart, pays off, doing the self-work, pays off, doing big investments, paid off let’s let’s also, I want to touch on that real quick. You can invest it in your business. Like you have you gone through LCS certification. I feel like you have, did you do LCS?
Alyssa Hall (43:01): No, I haven’t.
Kristen Boss (43:01): Okay. Okay. But you’ve you have done investments with coaches. Would you mind sharing, like, I’d love to hear what, what you’ve invested in your personal growth, because I think my audience needs to also maybe experience a little bit of sticker shock and being like, Hey, if a single mom in the Bronx can invest, so can you?
Alyssa Hall (43:22): Yes. Oh my gosh. Okay. Like hold onto your seats. Because like, when I first started investing, it’s all started with my coaching certification and this was 2018. I was still with my daughter’s father and there was actually no 2017 was when I said I want to be a life coach. And I was like, dude, it’s $11,000. Nah, forget it. I have no money. I’m making $22 an hour. Oh no. JK. I was making $16 an hour at that time making $16 an hour. No, I can’t do that a year later. I was like, I’m tired of these jobs that I hate. I’m over it. I’m going to become a coach. This is really what will make me happy. And you know what, it’ll make me some more money. I’m going to do it. That was 2018. I took out a loan and I did it.
Alyssa Hall (44:17): And on the second day of coach training, I broke up with my daughter’s father. So I was like, oh my God, I just took out an $11,000 loan. I’m sitting here making $16 an hour. He was paying all the bills. I was like buying food or whatever. And I was like, okay, I can S I still have time to back out. I still have time to like reverse the loan or whatever. But then I was just like, you know what, no, this is what’s going to make me happy. And this is what’s going to get me to the level that I want to be. And the reason why I start there is because that thought is what has like allowed me to continue to invest and continue to do what it is I need to do is just like, I, there is no turning back for me.
Alyssa Hall (44:59): I’m not going to sit here and tell myself, oh, you know what? I’m not going to invest the $5,000. I’d rather just sit here and make $16 an hour until I’ve complete all the education that I’m trying to complete in order to become a therapist. That’s my long-term goal. But like, what’s like, I literally these last three months, because of all those investments, I made more than what I’ve ever made in a year, more than what I’ve ever made in a year, because of all these investments. So that was the first one, $11,000 last year I spent I want to say maybe around like five, no, like seven actually. No. Cause I went to an event. I traveled to San Diego for an event. I just don’t much. I spent about like 7,000 or $8,000 on my business last year. And then this year. And that’s not even counting, like buying websites, doing all the little, you know..
Kristen Boss (45:54): Yeah. Let’s just talk about the big, the big. Let’s talk about the big boys that make you want to puke a little bit.
Alyssa Hall (46:00): So I did that and those are all on coaches that seven to $8,000 all on coaches this year I’ve spent. And we’re only in September, I’ve spent, let me see like $5,000 on that one program, 3000 that’s 8,000, then another 5,000. We’re at 13,000 around the 13 to 15,000. That’s just off the top of my head. And it’s funny. Cause like I just finished doing my taxes for this quarter and this quarter is the only quarter I’ve actually made money. So it’s just like, oh my gosh, like I made all this money. And then you see like the actual profit that you made is this. So was just like, it’s so funny, but like you, I don’t feel it. I don’t hate that at all. And that’s what I really want to like hone in and like put into like all of your brains. It’s that when you start making money that I don’t feel when I have to pay my taxes. I don’t feel when I have to purchase something for my business, because I know that what actually I do feel is the money that comes in and that’s what’s most important because it’ll allow me to make even more money.
Kristen Boss (47:12): I love that I added the total is about $33,000 of investing. And what’d you do it again?
Alyssa Hall (47:18): A hundred percent.
Kristen Boss (47:19): Yeah. It just changes you once you, once you experience, I don’t know about you, but the first time I paid for a high ticket on my growth and all my dream, like before I even had one call with that coach, it caused a change in me. It totally changed my self-concept and how I saw myself like, oh, I’m the girl that actually puts money on her dreams, like, and does big things. Oh, man. And so when that, when our self-concept changes, we start acting accordingly. So I love that. I love that. You’ve just, you’ve done the big things and it’s paying off and it, it keeps going, it gets to keep going from here. This is, I like to call this, you hit the tipping point and now all that’s available for you. Is it exponential growth? Speaking of exponential growth, I’d love to ask you, I, why do you as a diversity coach, as an anti-racist coach today, for people that have platforms and I see you moving into corporate circles as well why do you believe this work is important?
Alyssa Hall (48:25): Oh my gosh, there it is so important on so many levels and I’ll try to make it as succinct as possible, but let’s pretend all you do is work on yourself as a human being. We don’t realize it, but we’re actually important people to somebody. There is at least one person in your life who listens to you, who asks you for even just asked you for advice, or who even just talks to you. We all have at least one person, whether it be your, your spouse, your friend, your kids, your parents. Imagine if you were to become a safe individual, become anti-racist really. And what that means is not just like, oh, I’m not racist. It’s okay. It’s more of just like actually calling out and correcting racism. As you see it. Imagine if you were to do that with your friend who is a business owner, right?
Alyssa Hall (49:24): And they don’t realize that they’re being prejudiced or they don’t realize that some of the things that they’re saying are racist and you have a conversation with them. What impact do you think that your friend who’s the business owner now has, or your friend who’s the CEO of some company or even in HR. Right? imagine the impact that, that one conversation that you had, and if that’s the only person that you ever talk to, what impact that will have, and that’s just doing the work on yourself as a person. So if you were to do it as a business owner, like for me, where I noticed like everyone was like, flailing is like Facebook groups. It was a literal hot mess in Facebook groups. So just like imagine incorporating this work into your business, allowing the people in your Facebook group to feel safe.
Alyssa Hall (50:13): And that looks like someone making a comment that may not seem like it’s prejudice. It may not seem that there are some racist undertones, but you know, because you’ve done the training, you’ve done the work, and the people that are being affected by that. They know, but they’re the only ones that they see it. So they’re feeling like they’re just standing here alone facing this person or having to deal with this person. And then here you come swooping in. And you’re just like, actually we don’t tolerate that here. Actually, let me educate you on why what you said was not good. Let me educate you on why what you said was actually prejudice and it’s hurtful. And we don’t tolerate that type of speech here because when you see in like bigger companies, it’s always like, oh, we are an equal opportunity company we build there’s no discrimination here.
Alyssa Hall (50:59): There’s no racism here. And it’s just like, yes. Okay. You don’t say the N-word. That’s good. There are so many things that are deeper than that. And being able to call those out and fix that is so big. Imagine like network marketing, imagine on your team, imagine the women that you can help by actually having them see, Hey, you’re a safe person. You’re someone who I feel comfortable talking to about what’s wrong about why it’s difficult for me to even join your team. And you’ll understand me. Imagine when she does finally join your team, imagine the impact that she could make on her family for making money. That’s huge. That’s insanely huge all from having anti-racism and DEI in your business. And that’s literally just like two random examples, but there’s so many more ways.
Kristen Boss (51:51): I love that. And I, I love that how you described it as earlier in this episode, I said that it’s, I see you standing in the gap and saying, I’m, I’m going to help you get from here to there. But what you’re, you’re not just doing that, but you’re teaching me and teaching others how to stand in the gap. And it becomes a ripple effect and like taking ownership and learning. And I, I so appreciate Alyssa. There’s, there’s a lot of voices out there right now. And I just appreciate that your voice is just, it’s compassionate from a place of wanting to educate and from wanting to make a positive difference. And I really, I believe that’s why you’re making such an impact as an anti-racist coach. I believe that’s why you were having success because you are creating a conversation, a safe place where people have a conversation and say, okay, please, correct me if I’m wrong.
Kristen Boss (52:44): I want to know because that’s a really vulnerable thing as a business owner to be like, Hey, show me my blind spots and help me see that. And it’s, it’s vulnerable. And that the fact that you are creating a safe place as a coach is I am truly thankful for, and I I’m thankful for the work you do. And I want my audience to know more about that. So if someone in my audience wants to, to be educated herself and learn to stand in the gap and have that ripple effect, how can she learn about working with you? Is there a website where can they find you?
Alyssa Hall (53:18): Yes. so you can find me on Instagram at Ally the life coach I’m on Facebook, but my name is extremely simple. So you’re going to find a hundred different versions of me, but it’s Alyssa Hall. Yeah. Good luck finding that, but I’m there in the show notes. And by the time this episode releases, my website is like still being worked on. It’s going to be so beautiful as the first website I have like not done myself. I’m so excited, but it’s taken a while. So those are the two main places to find me. I have a landing page that I can give you to put in there.
Kristen Boss (53:57): Yeah, we’ll put, we’ll link it all up in the show notes again, Alyssa, this was just such a joy. Thank you for coming on the show. Thank you for telling your story. I know my audience I really hope it was a learning opportunity for them. And I hope more people will connect with you. So thank you again and listeners, we will catch you guys next week. If you love this episode, shout us out. Tag us, tell us this episode needs to be shared. I don’t care about any of my other episodes. Share this one, get this one out. This is important work. We need to talk about money. We need to talk about diversity. We need to talk about anti-racism. These are conversations we have and as influencers, it is our responsibility to have them. We will catch you guys next week.
Kristen Boss (54:46): That wraps up today’s episode. Hey, if you love today’s show, I would love for you to take a minute and give a rating with a review. If you desire to elevate the social selling industry, that means we need more people listening to this message so that they can know it can be done a different way. And if you’re ready to join me, it’s time for you to step into the Social Selling Academy, where I give you all the tools, training, and support to help you realize your goals. In the academy, you get weekly live coaching so that you are never lost or stuck in confusion. Whether you are new in the business or been in the industry for a while, this is the premier coaching program for the modern network marketer. Go to www.thesocialsellingacademy.com to learn more.